As[G] I went home on Monday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I[C] saw a horse outside the door where my old horse should be,
Well I[G] called me wife and said to her,will you[C] kindly tell to me,
Who[G] owns that horse outside the door where[D] my old horse should[G] be,
Ha[G] your drunk,your drunk you silly old fool,still you cannot see,
That's a lovey sow that me[D] mother sent to[G] me,
Well[G] its many a day I travelled,a hundred miles or more,
But a saddle on a sow I[D] never saw before.
[2]
And as I went home on tuesday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a coat behind the door where my old coat should be,
Well I called me wife and said to her will you kindly tell to me,
Who owns that coat behind the door where my old coat should be,
'Ha your drunk you silly old fool,and still you cannot see,
Thats the wollen blanket that me mother sent to me,
'Well its many a day I travelled,a hundred miles or more,
But buttons on a blanket sure I never saw before.
[3]
And as I came home on a Wednesday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a pipe upon the chair,where my old pipe should be,
'Well I called me wife and said to her would you kindle tell to me,
Who owns that pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be,
'Ha your drunk you silly old fool,and still you cannot see,
Thats a lovely tin whistle that me mother sent to me,
'Well its many a day I travelled,a hundred miles or more,
But tobacco in a tin whistle sure I never saw before.
[4]
And as I went home on a Thursday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw two boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be,
Well I called me wife and said to her will you kindly tell to me,
Who owns them boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be,
'Ha your drunk you sill old fool still you cannot see,
Thats two lovely geranium pots me mother gave to me,
'Well its many a day I travelled,a hundred miles or more,
But laces on a geranium pot sure I never saw before,
[5]
And as I went home on a Friday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a head upon the bed where my old head should be,
Well I called me wife and said to her will you kindly tell to me,
Who owns that head upon the bed where my old head should be,
'Ha your drunk you silly old fool and still you cannot see,
Thats a baby boy that me mother sent to me,
Well its many a day I travelled,a hundred miles or more,
But a baby boy with whiskers sure I never saw before.
[6]
As I went home on Saturday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw two hands upon her breasts where my old hands should be,
Well I called me wife and said to her will you kindly tell to me,
Who owns them hands upon you breasts where my old hands should be,
Ah your drunk you silly old fool and still you cannot see,
Thats a lovely night gown me mother sent to me,
Well its many a day I travelled,a hundred miles or more,
But fingers on a night gownh I never saw before.
[7]
As I went home on a Sunday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a thing in her thing where ny old thing should be,
Well I called me wife and said to her will you kindly tell to me,
Who owns that thing in your thing where my old thing should be,
'Ah your drunk you silly old fool and still you cannot see,
Thats a lovely tin whistle me mother sent to me,
Well its many a day I travelled,a hundred miles or more,
But hair on a tin whistle sure I never saw before.
